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"Jack, I said no ball in the hall."
Reminded Jinny with her call

-"But what is it about my ball
that I can’t play with it in the hall?"

Jinny glared at the little clown
"It will turn the hall upside down."

-“Turn upside down? That's a neat trick!
How do you do that? With a kick?"

-"You kick that ball and I'll pull your ear
You can play outside, but never here."

Jinny walked away and left Jack aware
about the ball in the hall, it was no dare.

Jack quickly ran the hall to play outside
but running made his shoelaces untie

He tripped and the ball flew off his hands
It knocked four vases and two table stands

And right after the loud "crash" and "crack"
Jinny came back furious shouting at Jack

'What did I say? Didn't you listen at all?!'
- 'Yes, I did, you said no ball in the hall!'

- 'Then why did you disobeyed me if you knew?'
- ' I didn't! It was the ball, it didn't listen to you.'

The angry Jinny walked over to Jack
whose big, silly head got a smack.
Well, I can't write to save my life, but here I go. I'm not sure if you'd be able
to tell but I'm a HUGE fan of Dr. Seuss' stories and riddles!

Here I finally introduce a character from Jesterday's cast: Jeannette a.k.a. Jinny.
She's a character based off my real life best friend, and I have to say, Jinny and
Jack have the most amusing relationship. Even though Jack messes up sometimes
by accident, he takes advantage of the case and makes Jinny very irritated. Jinny
was the kind of maid that enjoyed her job until Jack came along. While she is strict
she haves her tender side, just make sure you don't do what Jack does to her. u v u
She haves an elder sister that also works as a maid, Lizzette a.k.a. Lizzy, who I'll
illustrate soon, hopefully.

Similar Artworks


If anybody can suggest better lines for this silly little poem/story, feel free to do so,
just keep in mind that writing is not my thing-yo. I can't even categorize this...
:iconlazycryplz:
Add a Comment:
 
:iconpuddingvalkyrie:
PuddingValkyrie Featured By Owner Jul 27, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
This is a cute poem.  Poor Jack, it wasn't his fault X3
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2013
Hehe, I'm glad you enjoyed it! :D
Reply
:iconmerryweathery:
Merryweathery Featured By Owner Apr 20, 2013  Professional Writer
"Well, you can rhyme better than me. I always end up inventing words," said I, as I twirred the rocostulating scurr.
Reply
:iconanimething7:
animething7 Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
you say you cant write but i enjoyed it! :D i thought it was funny
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2013
I got it now, LOL thank you very much. XD
Reply
:iconanimething7:
animething7 Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
lol no problem :D
Reply
:iconllikeoavsine:
LlikeOaVsinE Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
lol love it XD
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Jan 23, 2013
Glad you like it! C:
Reply
:iconshinigamiryuku:
ShinigamiRyuku Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012
very nice
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 4, 2012
Thank you C:
Reply
:iconetc-anime:
etc-anime Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
love it :3
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012
Glad you like it ^^
Reply
:icondenshia:
Denshia Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012   Traditional Artist
lol that was cute ^^ and rhymey
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
Thankies! > 7 < )/
Reply
:icondenshia:
Denshia Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012   Traditional Artist
You're welcome ^^ I love all your art =3=
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
Hehe *//v//* TY!
Reply
:icondenshia:
Denshia Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012   Traditional Artist
You're welcome ^^
Reply
:iconamaliadaniels:
amaliadaniels Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Student General Artist
Cool! This is so fun!
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
Thank you! ^^
Reply
:iconamaliadaniels:
amaliadaniels Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Student General Artist
no problem!!!! XD
Reply
:iconfoganddreams:
FogandDreams Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
love it! i like how he blames the ball totally funny!
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
Thank you vey much, happy you like it! :)
Reply
:iconfoganddreams:
FogandDreams Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012
your welcome! =D
Reply
:iconippman475:
Ippman475 Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Student General Artist
hey that sounds like me
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
^^;
Reply
:iconblackparadedeathnote:
BlackParadeDeathNote Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Did this remind anyone else of Bankt, Pewdiepie's version if Lucius.
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
...What? ^^;
Reply
:iconblackparadedeathnote:
BlackParadeDeathNote Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Pewdiepie is a youtuber and a gamer. While playing this game called "Lucius" he finds a ball and calls it "Bankt"(Swedish for something. I forgot). He would always carry Bankt through the halls and everywhere with him. :D Make more sense?
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
Oh I see! LOL There's a ball in the hall! ' 7 ' )/
Reply
:iconblackparadedeathnote:
BlackParadeDeathNote Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
There is that Bankt the ball in the hall with Lucius. They are happily killing people. (=ヮ= )૭
Reply
:iconmewmewnya1:
mewmewnya1 Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
omg i love this poem! i just wrote rhyming couplets for school and i laughed when i read this!. I love Dr.Suess too! XD
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
Aw, thank you! I'm happy you like it and that it was able
to make you laugh, fellow Dr. Seuss' fan! * v * )/
Reply
:iconapplebetty:
AppleBetty Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
this has tons of potential to be a really cute poem, but i trip over so many lines reading it. Work on the rhythm of each stanza; and if you can't make each line fit the rhythm, change the verse structure (might actually make it more interesting).

Jinny made a long, grumbling sound
"With that ball you'll turn the hall upside down."

versus

Jinny said, with a groan and a frown,
"You'll turn the furniture upside down!
Then Mom and Dad will be so mad
They'll drop-kick you to the next town!"

Sorry, embellished a little. But hopefully you see what I mean.
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
Oh wooow~ I do see what you mean. This is such a big help! Thank you so
much for taking a bit of your time to help me out here, I appreciate it! :hug:

I love that little stanza (stanza is it? LOL) you made there, I'm ashamed it
is far more interesting than what I have there u//////u And it is EXACTLY
that stanza that gave me trouble the most. For the rythm, I tried to make
keep each stanza with 2 lines and with the same amount of syllables. But
particularly that stanza gave me a hard time and I even debated on uploading
this poem because of it. I'm still struggling with that can I replace it with.
Strangely, I had the word 'frown' nominated for that stanza to go with 'down',
but it didn't turn out... Orz

Buddy, do you think you could note me some other lines you had trouble
with? If you don't mind, of course, I'd really, REALLY, appreciate it if you
decide to. Thank you very much! :D
Reply
:iconapplebetty:
AppleBetty Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
it's just a matter of lines that don't fit the overall flow, i.e. the number of syllables is too drastically different from the average established by the first stanza. It's something you have to play with a lot before you get it just right. writing this poem again in several different rhyme patterns will help you figure it out better than if I just dissected the thing for you.

if you come up with a new version later, though, i won't mind looking at it.
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
Thank you! ^^
Reply
:iconjohnwroberts:
JohnWRoberts Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012  Professional Filmographer
Oh shit! Run forest! RUN!!!!!!!!
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
XD ?
Reply
:iconlordofstupidity:
LordofStupidity Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
Lol, she looks like she's gonna slug him!!XD cute little poem you have here:3
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
She is! ' A ' )/ She is capable of pretty much anything when it comes
to cases with this little devil LOL. Thank you very much! O v O
Reply
:iconlordofstupidity:
LordofStupidity Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012
Lol, you're welcome!!:3
Reply
:iconpinkstrawberryflower:
PinkStrawberryFlower Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
i love this verse it's so cute~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
Thank you! glad you like it! :D
Reply
:iconlosttidelover:
LostTideLover Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
FFFFFFFFFFFFFF AMG THAT IS PRECIOUS

you write so well!! t;A;t~♥ I love it!
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
Thank you very much but no, my writing is so super sucky Q///v///Q
Reply
:iconlosttidelover:
LostTideLover Featured By Owner Dec 3, 2012
shhhh i thought it was beautiful >w<~
Reply
:iconchocobunny0:
ChocoBunny0 Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
Poor lil Jack, it was the Ball fault it didn't listen and just wanted to play to badly XD
Very nice story by the way :3
Reply
:iconjoyfool:
Joyfool Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
LOL yes, naughty ball. Q A Q
Thank you very much, sweetie~!
Reply
:iconchocobunny0:
ChocoBunny0 Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2012
It sure is naughty...or just can't hear since it doesn't have ears XD
You are very welcome ^0^~
Reply
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December 2, 2012
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